The Leverage of Generosity

Is it possible to become wealthy by being generous? And I don't mean the type of generosity of I do for you because you will do for me. But true generosity...giving for the joy of giving. Are we capable as human beings of such selflessness? Is it possible to truly be generous in a capitalist nation? Is it human nature to be greedy? Is greed a bad word? How much is too much? How much is enough?
Last week a woman at my day job said to me,"Somedays I just wish I would drop dead."
This really stuck with me. I know I'm shifting gears and I hate to sound metaphysical but I've been thinking about life, money, love, family, and my own mortality lately. I've been thinking about my life lately in terms of "what do I want to accomplish while I'm here" and "how many lives can I influence" and "how can I be a better human being"

Sometimes just BEING
is hard enough
Want to live before I die.
Don't want to drop dead
A nameless faceless human being with a decaying body
Want my spirit to live on.

Don't want to be average or ordinary.
I am young
Already weary of this society of consumerism
Survival of the fittest one with the fattest pockets loaded
with lawyers, politicians , and this illusion of a nation of equality and inclusion.

My dreams are getting crushed daily in the melting pot religion of America the beautiful.
America is beautiful but when will we let our true beauty shine.
Could we exist without guns
without walls
without war
without greed
without fear
without prejudice
without hatred?

I live inside my head
Full of ideals
I deal with false utopias in the imaginary playworld in my head.
That never never land
That never-in-my-real-life-will-I-see-peace-land
That-I-hope-to-Heaven-that-someone-hears-my-prayers-land

Don't know exactly why I'm here
But choose to launch love through international airwaves
To break down invisible barriers
that guard the hardened hearts from change.
Covert silient missionary.
A peace vigilante
armed with songs
with lyrics that will
break you down

Elusive Life Purpose

Wish this life came with an instructional manual.
Keep pressing buttons.
Keep wiggling wires.
Keep keeping everything.
Listening to birds chirping,
Trying to decipher their language.
Maybe they have a clue.
What to do?
What to do when you're brand new?
When the world manufactures its own revolutions,
Do you stand on the conveyor belt called ground and
stare up at the night sky?
Light looking down from star that is Mars.
That is what they say.
Who's to say that day is day and night is night?
We gather here.
We do what we're told.
We listen but don't hear what they say.
Who are they anyway who are we anyway.
Y
M
I
Hear?

The Joy of Wi-Fi

I'm listening to Tupac on a Vh1 online music station on a laptop. I am not yet living the life I want to live. My dream is to create art(music, poetry, films, & more). This 9 to 5 life is not status quo for me. There has to be another alternative and I am pushing myself to find it. Some days it seems too easy to slip on complacency. Also the older I get the more I seem to desire comfort...stability. But in order for me to succeed I must continually move beyond my comfort zone. Must not let fear keep me boxed in.

Powerless in Brooklyn (Blackout 2003)

Where were you when the lights went out?

Blackout 2003. Fortunately, I was not underground when the lights went out. I walked out of my job at 4:15pm yesterday when the power went out. I thought it was just my place of work, but after walking across 5 avenues I realized something was seriously wrong. People gathered around car radios and boomboxes. When I heard that New York, Detroit, Cleveland, & Toronto had no power, my first thought was, "Oh no terrorists have struck again". Just like 911 my first thought was to get home and track down my family. Cell phones were shot. The cellular networks suck. We, as a society, have become so heavily reliant on our doodads it is scary. I feel like a hyprocrite typing that statement on a wireless Wi-Fi laptop. I take so much for granted. I thank God the power is back on.

Initial Words

Wordgazer

Weary eyes wander
sleepless like the city
consuming the streets of the information superhighway

canvasing pages as late night infomercials blare in the background noise
of my insomniac dreams.

Draining my brain
in a refrain of song I've not yet written.
Been bitten by the bug that writes without biting.

-SAR2003

My first time at the National Poetry Slam was a great experience for me personally.
I heard poetry that rocked my world and managed to sidestep slam politics and negative energy. My team rocked! Postmidnight, Celena Glenn, & Cristin O'Keefe Aptowicz performed wonderfully and inspired me.

Chicago is the only city that I can see myself livin' besides New York. I look forward to going to St. Louis with a team or maybe if I'm brave enough...on my own. This is going to be a tough year competing against some of the finest poets in the country. I want the opportunity to work with a group of artists to create poetry and music to share in Nellyville.